How not to appear masculine

I was having Target withdrawals (I hadn't been there since Sunday) so I stopped off on my way home to pick up some mailing boxes. They had 1 small size, and 6 empty spots. I should have walked out right then and there, but its Target, so I wandered for 45 more minutes to see what else I might "need".

I strolled through the grocery, picking up a gallon of whole milk (who knew!) and a California Pizza Kitchen Thai Chicken Pizza (only $5604.00!) as a dinner treat. I found myself sniffling from the cold weather outside and remembered we were out of Kleenex, and although I RARELY buy a 3 pack ($5.00 for Kleenex boggles my mind), I picked it up anyway with the understanding that it will be nice to be "stocked up."

Finally, as with any trip to Target, I visited the DVD department. They have the same 30-45 movies for sale every time I go back there, but I can't help myself. I'm always a sucker for a good deal. Sure enough, I see Stand By Me for the three-hundredth time, and decide to finally purchase it at the discounted price of $6.50.

I make my way to the register, and wrestle with the thought of waiting behind the 1 person in the regular lane with 500 items, or waiting in the "10 items or less" line with 5 other people. I'm a sucker for punishment, so I went with the 1 person line (and ended up waiting 5 minutes). As I neatly stack my items onto the belt, one by one, I realize how emasculating my purchase will be. Sure enough the 17-year old eye balls my sappy-movie, "off-the-diet" frozen pizza, truckload of Kleenex's and my half gallon of liquid fat to wash it all down with. The clerk looked at me like a train wrecked college co-ed, I knew I failed.

You could write a book about Target.